where does she get this stuff
Feb. 27th, 2003 11:31 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bellapalmerai was reading old FOD entrys and i came across the one mandy wrote for me and it was the funniest thing ever, in fact i read it to my roomate and she thought it was hysterical, so im going to be cool and type it in here for you all to read.
Farewell And Thanks For The Jellybeans - 5/20/2002
This morning I woke up and realized I wanted a parakeet. Not just any parakeet, but one that could sing. I begged my mom over and over but all she did was jump out the window.
Crunchity crunchity crunchity.
Okay. So I have a confession: I stole my cat's spleen. I couldn't help it. I've already taken three of my friends' spleens, my mom's spleen, my grandmother's spleen, and pretty soon I hope to obtain my father's spleen. Please don't think I'm weird.
I AM A SOUL MAN!!! A SOUL MAN I TELL YOU!!!!
It was a dark and stormy night. And then I realized my boxers were missing.
Yes I wear boxers is there SOMETHING WEIRD ABOUT THAT!??? geeze. Some people are so inconsiderate.
Okay. So my mandible hurts. Please will you help my mandible? Speaking about helping, I would like you all to join the "SAVE THE BANDAIDS" foundation. I found out that there is a major shortage in the Mediterranean Sea and wanted everyone who lives there to have plenty of bandaids.
UNA HAMBURGUESA!!!!!!!!! JA JA JA JA JA!!!!! :D Hamburgers are the cutest foods alive. Oh my goodness gracious the way they look at you with those adorable little buns, preferably with sesame seeds, and lettuce and mustard, it makes me want to melt. But nothing is as cute as the..... KETCHUP! I don't know how I could say no to a hamburger with ketchup on it. They are so adorable!!!! AWW!!!!!!!
What do you suppose a duck and an elephant would look if they had a child?
HAH!!!! if you wanna find the answer, look in the mirror silly!!!!!!!
So back to my parakeet. My dad just told me I could get him and I need a good name. I've been considering "Phlegm" because that's one of the prettiest names I've ever heard but I'm still open to suggestion. I wish my parents named me Phlegm. People could call me Phlegmy for a nickname. Boy do I wish that was my name.
Oh no... there's a man outside the window. I think it's Walden my secret boyfriend. He stalks me. He's kinda hot but it's just that he's got these giant muscles that bulge out and I mean some muscularness is okay but my goodness you should see this guy, it looks like he takes steroids or something.... he's just a bunch of bumps from all of his muscles and when he tries to hold my hand he breaks my fingers cause they're so strong. It's very sad but I don't mind because he loves me very much. I just get a little scared when he hides outside my window, ya know??? It's ok because he does an impression of a dying worm that I think is so cute, which is why I'm so madly in love with the guy. Ah, Walden. <3 <3 <3
Anyhow, I'm glad I could update because this is one of the most insightful entries I've ever written and reading this really gave you a piece of my soul, believe me. So I have to go because I haven't showered in 2 1/2 months and my mom just passed out because of the stench. Farewell my friends and thanks for the jellybeans!!!
~Traci, aka Phlegm
well i hope you enjoyed that cause i sure did. lol.
Farewell And Thanks For The Jellybeans - 5/20/2002
This morning I woke up and realized I wanted a parakeet. Not just any parakeet, but one that could sing. I begged my mom over and over but all she did was jump out the window.
Crunchity crunchity crunchity.
Okay. So I have a confession: I stole my cat's spleen. I couldn't help it. I've already taken three of my friends' spleens, my mom's spleen, my grandmother's spleen, and pretty soon I hope to obtain my father's spleen. Please don't think I'm weird.
I AM A SOUL MAN!!! A SOUL MAN I TELL YOU!!!!
It was a dark and stormy night. And then I realized my boxers were missing.
Yes I wear boxers is there SOMETHING WEIRD ABOUT THAT!??? geeze. Some people are so inconsiderate.
Okay. So my mandible hurts. Please will you help my mandible? Speaking about helping, I would like you all to join the "SAVE THE BANDAIDS" foundation. I found out that there is a major shortage in the Mediterranean Sea and wanted everyone who lives there to have plenty of bandaids.
UNA HAMBURGUESA!!!!!!!!! JA JA JA JA JA!!!!! :D Hamburgers are the cutest foods alive. Oh my goodness gracious the way they look at you with those adorable little buns, preferably with sesame seeds, and lettuce and mustard, it makes me want to melt. But nothing is as cute as the..... KETCHUP! I don't know how I could say no to a hamburger with ketchup on it. They are so adorable!!!! AWW!!!!!!!
What do you suppose a duck and an elephant would look if they had a child?
HAH!!!! if you wanna find the answer, look in the mirror silly!!!!!!!
So back to my parakeet. My dad just told me I could get him and I need a good name. I've been considering "Phlegm" because that's one of the prettiest names I've ever heard but I'm still open to suggestion. I wish my parents named me Phlegm. People could call me Phlegmy for a nickname. Boy do I wish that was my name.
Oh no... there's a man outside the window. I think it's Walden my secret boyfriend. He stalks me. He's kinda hot but it's just that he's got these giant muscles that bulge out and I mean some muscularness is okay but my goodness you should see this guy, it looks like he takes steroids or something.... he's just a bunch of bumps from all of his muscles and when he tries to hold my hand he breaks my fingers cause they're so strong. It's very sad but I don't mind because he loves me very much. I just get a little scared when he hides outside my window, ya know??? It's ok because he does an impression of a dying worm that I think is so cute, which is why I'm so madly in love with the guy. Ah, Walden. <3 <3 <3
Anyhow, I'm glad I could update because this is one of the most insightful entries I've ever written and reading this really gave you a piece of my soul, believe me. So I have to go because I haven't showered in 2 1/2 months and my mom just passed out because of the stench. Farewell my friends and thanks for the jellybeans!!!
~Traci, aka Phlegm
well i hope you enjoyed that cause i sure did. lol.
